Marika Malaea

faithful marauder + fake royal

Nigga-tron Finds Love

with 2 comments

Nigga-tron likes redheads.

I believe the artwork of children should go on the fridge and not on my local bus stop. Yes, I am one of those assholes.

Like the bus stop isn’t a minefield of crap to navigate anyways: I’m panhandled to by every imaginable creature, crazy people warn me of impending doom, teenagers play awful rap at head-cracking volumes, meth heads use me to shield their drug deals, and the severely mentally disabled end up thinking I’m their mom (ditto girlfriend, guardian, or sister — and one time, a dog).

On top of all that, now I’m dealing with your six-year old’s shitty bus stop art.  Of course I think Timmy is super talented! He’s the brightest Branch Davidian among us! But the sun doesn’t actually wear sunglasses — does every six-year old do this? Yes, even I — and Neptoon is spelled with a U-N-E, and that rocket ship looks positively dipped in a scabby STD.  So this is what kids are learning in school.

Who am I kidding, you think he’s the next Thomas Kincaid, Painter of Light. But someone has to be Picasso; I hope dear Timmy likes absinthe and ears.

Besides, most kids don’t even ride public transit. The bus comes to their house, or a minivan drops them off, or they use the buddy system while walking to school. All I’m saying is I don’t come to your house and spray-paint your mailbox, or draw big-eared monkeys on your mom’s Subaru, or make big shaky hearts on the sidewalk. Because that would look stupid.

Do you know how many artists are out there that need exposure and have actual talent? Like a fucktonillion, which wasn’t a number until this very moment. I wonder how many bus stop artists grow up to be Harvard valedictorians, and how many of them acknowledge just where that bus stop helped them along the way. I assume people from Harvard haven’t ever used a bus, so it’s hard to guess — but I’m thinking that number is zero. I just wish we could promote our local artists and make our bus stops look cool, instead of creepy Blair Witch Project murals (HAND PRINTS! Everywhere!). Some kind of impermanent, rotating artwork that advertises the artist’s website and sparks interest in different types of visual design. At least bus stop Facebook photos would look cooler.

I know it’s harmless fun and cute for kids and probably at-risk homeless youth painted that bus stop after kicking heroin for good, and wow am I an asshole.  But my hunch is that Metro hooked up with a school or neighborhood or community org or D) All of the above, and voila! Your child’s eight-year old scribbling can be seen for miles and miles, forever and ever, amen. Someday, when little Timmy is buying meth behind me at the bus stop, he’ll look over and think, “Goddamn, that’s ugly! What retard can’t spell ‘Neptune’?”

And the circle of life continues.

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Written by sn0tteh

July 6, 2010 at 6:29 PM

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged with ,

2 Responses

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  1. you ride metro and you are complaining about the bus stop art and not the in-bus poetry? that’s a damn trap on a long bus ride. you just read the same bad thing over and over and over.

    fucktonillion makes this whole post perfect though.

    @chemo_babe

    July 6, 2010 at 7:03 PM

  2. God I hate that in-bus poetry. I don’t even look at it anymore, it’s like getting brain-raped in front of an audience.

    sn0tteh

    July 6, 2010 at 7:57 PM


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