Marika Malaea

faithful marauder + fake royal

The Importance of Toes

with 7 comments

So I’m trying to do what comes least naturally to me – compassion – and it’s ridiculously hard. Do you know how many idiots are out there, begging for my unsolicited judgments and pre-teen finger-pointing? Think of all the people who spell your and you’re the wrong way (my eyes! they bleed!); the men who buy shiny plastic nutsacks for their trucks (TruckNutz! – available in ‘Flesh’ – kill me!); Americans who make signs that say “OBAMA Half-Breed Muslin” (which is a FABRIC); and religious groups who posthumously baptize Adolph Hitler (Racism + Genocide = Heaven? OKAY, I’M IN). You know. Those assholes. She said compassionately.

I have a friend whose relationship I just can’t get behind; he doesn’t treat her very good, there’s a lot of animosity + sordid history, and she only seems happy half the time. I feel she deserves better, and suspect she knows this, but it’s not my place to say anything. I’ve been that girl, and it’s an exercise in painful, heartbreaking futility. Truthfully, I’ve been so… ‘condescendingly hateful’ is the only way to put it…about this relationship, that it never even occurred to me that they loved each other. It never even crossed my mind. And I was shocked how biased I was, how much I’d de-valued their relationship. Once I saw it with new eyes, I realized she’s just young – and yet old enough to make her own mistakes. Of course I want the best for her, but we might have different ideas about what that might mean. In the end, I just want her to be happy. Doesn’t mean I like the guy – but that doesn’t mean I can’t make an effort, either.

Why can’t I just hate people to the depths of my soul sometimes? Maybe I’m traveling light, without the cumbersome soul – maybe that’s what ails me. I have a hard time swallowing the God bukkake because I enjoy tangible things – logic – the explainable – reason. That’s called science. That being said, I allow room for energy, for the unexplained, for curiosity, and progress; sometimes people call that ‘science,’ too. How can I believe in magic, but not buy into the Faith business? My only answer is: I’m not into bukkake. And Harry Potter was way easier to read than The Bible.

Skinny girls who wear jeans so tight that it makes them look fat or lumpy – guys in shiny shirts, sporting shades at night – self-appointed music critics with terrible taste in music – The Guy Who Has A Story For Every Situation – racist grandpas with no sense of humor (the funny ones just aren’t as scary) – Craig’s List M4W Casual Encounter adsGrimace from the McDonald’s Playland characters – Sarah fucking Palin – people who don’t eat bacon (WHAT?!) – and stereotypes of all kinds. There are so many things to judge, to make fun of – to point your finger at and say, I don’t have it so bad! I have all of my limbs! I can sing on-key! Life may suck at times, but at least I have good taste in music – at least I threw the Esq’s shiny shirts away – at least there is bacon.  I guess the trick is feeling that way without cutting others down – but I don’t really see it that way. I see it as more like finding a new perspective on them, and shining a light on all that is hideous and unholy, for the good of the land. She said compassionately.

I can get over myself – I can put myself out there – I can even be nice. I can find the good in people, and think positively… BUT I WILL NOT GO WITHOUT BACON. I’d rather go without the opera, or public transportation, or toes. Yes, I said toes.


Written by sn0tteh

September 29, 2009 at 11:26 PM

7 Responses

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  1. Those truck nut things are so ridiculous. As if people don’t think enough already that the drivers of said large truck are compensating for something.

    Badass Geek

    September 30, 2009 at 4:44 AM

  2. @Badass Geek I know, right? I was ready to poke fun, in an above-the-belt kind of way, but seeing how they spell TruckNutz just made me homicidal.


    September 30, 2009 at 2:29 PM

  3. will. never. google. bukkake. again.


    September 30, 2009 at 4:09 PM

  4. @stacymarie Yeah. ‘Bukkake’ is a search engine DREAM.


    September 30, 2009 at 4:11 PM

  5. Two words.



    September 30, 2009 at 4:17 PM

  6. Sangster

    September 30, 2009 at 4:17 PM

  7. @Sangster You’re killing me here. BACON DOGS?


    October 1, 2009 at 2:40 PM

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