Marika Malaea

faithful marauder + fake royal

Bachelor House

with 2 comments

Remember when I went on that semi-silent, semi-naked, vegetarian meditation retreat with my mom last year? It’s that time again, which is good – I could use some internal housekeeping. Even more so, the Esq could use 96 blissful hours alone, hours he doesn’t have to worry about me tipping over like a cow, help me boot up, or weigh my emotional responses in a lightning Pros & Cons list; nor will he have to feed me, hear “Could you just…?,” or include Reading My Mind Unsuccessfully into his afternoon routine. It’s been a long three months, for my Achilles tendon and the Esq’s peace of mind.

The man will have free reign to let his razor rust and the pizza boxes pile, with hours upon hours of squinting in the dark at a screen filled with zombies, hobbits, warriors, robots, Nazis, soldiers, and adventurous backdoor sluts. He’ll probably go to bed when the sun rises, and sleep until waking for a frozen dinner. I feel confident he’ll get some work done, but know he’ll use the evenings to game his little heart away; and when he’s not gaming, he’ll be watching UFC, because guys like dudes who beat the shit out of each other, no matter how gay or pornographic it looks. My man needs a sloth-like, indulgence-only break from his woman – just as I could use a stay in the woods, a massage by the river, and some time away with my girlfriends. There are about 12 of us going, and we leave in the morning. I hope to be much improved by the time I get back.

For you patient Hugo House peeps who donated to the cause, I’m finally finished with your blog posts! PHEW. Luckily, it only took me 189 days longer than I’d originally thought, so we’ve only aged like half a year. I’ll post them starting next Tuesday, after I get back – I was going to have them start while I was away, but realized I’d like to get your reactions in real time. The rest of it is coming along, as well – I’m getting help with the zine, and now that I can walk, baking your cakes will be much easier! I’ll send out requests for addresses next week, too, regarding those who get handmade cards. Thank you for being patient.

The Esq will blog a couple of times, provided he remembers to in the haze of his male liberation. And I’m going to try the ‘timed post,’ which I’m not all that thrilled about. I’m too much of a control freak, so if the ship is going to sink, I like being there so I can prevent it from sinking. I don’t want to be relaxing in a hot spring while my blog does a Titanic imitation, that’s all I’m saying.


Written by sn0tteh

September 16, 2009 at 4:16 PM

Posted in Uncategorized

2 Responses

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  1. Excellent site, keep up the good work. I read a lot of blogs on a daily basis and for the most part, people lack substance but, I just wanted to make a quick comment to say I’m glad I found your blog. Thanks, 🙂

    A definite great read.. ..


    Bill Bartmann

    September 21, 2009 at 12:22 PM

  2. @Bill Wow, thanks for the compliment! I randomly found your comment in my spam 🙂


    September 21, 2009 at 1:20 PM

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