Marika Malaea

faithful marauder + fake royal

Sweet, Salty, Sad

with 12 comments

What I’ve been consumed by for the past two hours is this blog:

One of my best friends sent me the link a while back with a warning; I don’t remember her exact words, but I interpreted the warning as: YOU HAVE TO READ THIS SHIT, I’VE BEEN BAWLING FOR HOURS, YOU’LL LOVE IT. It’s the same kind of unspoken warning I give the Esq when I taste a new dish, make that my-mouth-tastes-like-butthole expression, and then hold it out for him to try. A little corroboration never hurt anyone, although I like to call it ‘equality’. I ended up reading the About section and one post, and decided I wasn’t ready for it. But today I was–and yeah, I cried. I really envy the author’s turn of phrase, and marvel at the way she makes her grief look worn–beautiful–handmade–and timeless. It’s an interesting process, what she’s going through, although it’s something I hope to never face: losing a wee one. But you can tell it’s good for her, and as a blog, it’s really wonderful; the writing is weighty, while also being weightless. It’s heartbreaking, in just the right way.


Written by sn0tteh

November 25, 2008 at 12:34 AM

Posted in Uncategorized

12 Responses

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  1. Blame me-I recommended it to you.

    Let’s just say my therapist banned me from reading it once I told him about the subject content. Considering my past, and that I am a new/paranoid mother, he pointed out nothing good will come of me reading it. But yes, she is an excellent writer, she does know how to set the heart alight.


    November 25, 2008 at 4:41 AM

  2. Right now it seems a little too much like an overlong Bjork/Tori Amos/Jane Siberry/Alanis Morisette song for me, but in the right mindset I could easily spend an afternoon reading each post with a box of Kleenex nearby.

    Brave of her to process all of that so publicly. (And I mean that in a good way, I’m all for it.)


    November 25, 2008 at 4:57 AM

  3. I blame you, LilRed. 🙂 But it’s really great. And also nothing you should be reading. There’s no point! Bookmark it so you can read it in 25 years.

    Snotty McSnotterson

    November 25, 2008 at 9:05 AM

  4. Manthony, true… we should do it together, that would make it even worse. Sounds fun.

    I think it’s amazing she’s doing it so publicly, as well. I’m honest, but the shit she’s writing… it’s meta-honest. Beyond.

    Snotty McSnotterson

    November 25, 2008 at 9:07 AM

  5. Oh my god. Jane Siberry makes me want to scratch my own eyes out. seriously.

    So do overwrought grief blogs, by the by. I sure hope I project more than that, because I’m sure as hell not so one-dimensional in person. Besides, it doesn’t really qualify as tasting-like-butthole unless the background is black and the text is grey so that the moment you land, you know you are in the presence of TEH SAD.

    I’ve never been compared to butthole before, but I’ll take that. It’s kinda like gorgonzola cheese. You do not want to smell that mofo when you peel off the plastic. But bake it crumbled on pizza? heaven.

    So… yeah. That’s the long way round of saying thanks. And you can pass on my personal greetings to your therapist, lilred, and you can tell him to sit on it and spin.


    sweetsalty kate

    November 25, 2008 at 4:34 PM

  6. I would never compare you to Jane Siberry, but since I haven’t read anything else of yours, I guess I do see it as a grief blog… or on the opposite side, a celebration of life blog. Guess I should have mentioned that.

    And even though you said ‘thanks’, I still feel like I should apologize for some reason. Hm. Whatever, though. I think you’re an amazing writer, and that has nothing to do with sadness. And the blog is beautiful, truly.

    Snotty McSnotterson

    November 25, 2008 at 5:59 PM

  7. I'm just teasing marika. You're very kind and quite possibly the funniest recommendation I've ever seen. I'm still laughing at the butthole bit. (and the greeting to lilred's therapist was just silliness, too, I hope that came across)..

    Liam does come up now and then but I try to balance that with other stuff, that's all. And what you say is exactly it – I'd like to think there's celebration and light in every post about him, because that's how I feel when I go there, even when there's sadness too.

    Please don't apologize! my comment was all meant with a smile. I need to start using more of these > 🙂

    Thanks again, and thanks to lilred too. xo

    sweetsalty kate

    November 25, 2008 at 6:14 PM

  8. Oh good! Well…enjoy the apologetic email I just sent you, LOL. 🙂

    Snotty McSnotterson

    November 25, 2008 at 6:16 PM

  9. kate, huge fan of your writing! your sense of humor was noted. 🙂 And said therapist is a sweet grandparent with a boatload of dark humor. He’ll love being called out!

    Of course you are not one-dimensional THE SAD (heck, I found you through Sweet Juniper!) but the dark grieving parts of my heart are always drawn to THE SAD (which I can wallow in more than what is good for me).

    Also, having known Marika for approximately 10,000 years, getting an apologetic email out of her is a huge feat (said with the utmost love, my darling Bee)…she even wrote a whole post about it. 🙂


    November 25, 2008 at 8:39 PM

  10. Didn’t mean to suggest that it should be dismissed as an “overwrought grief blog!” Just that in the quick, easy, carefree world of the internets, that it required a certain attentiveness on the part of the reader to really gain the full experience. A quick and/or distracted read would be doing it an injustice!

    Since my current state of mind is distracted, to read the blog now would just create uncomfortable noise in my mind (a la Jane Siberry). But I do believe that the uncomfortableness brought up by such subject matter is extremely important (much moreso than Siberry’s music) in helping us grow and relate to each other as human beings!


    November 26, 2008 at 12:46 AM

  11. I apologized, yes I did. Then found out I didn’t need to. Which made me like Kate more 🙂

    Snotty McSnotterson

    November 26, 2008 at 1:32 AM

  12. I think I’ve only heard Jane Siberry once… is she one of those distraught indie songstress types with music that sounds like whales communicating, or I am I thinking of Kate Bush?

    Snotty McSnotterson

    November 26, 2008 at 4:29 PM

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